Subtle Aspirations

why the title? because that’s what i’m listening to : bryan adams - back to you! and there’s only think i’m thinking of :-)

the day started so rough… then i spoke at home and everything was so beautiful! life is so strange with so many undecisive thoughts and illusions and then its family again who shows you how to walk!

i didn’t have any particular conversation… just talked… sweety nothings to everyone… and it felt so good. i can’t remember me feeling so good in years…

mum was so funny… we were talking about rids coming here in may or so… and then rids passed the phone to mum… i’m telling her, “mum i love you lots!” and she goes like, “ya you know we have to go for yoga and all in the morning……”, i’m like, “mum, i love you” and she goes like, “i was thinking i’ll also come along with riddhi” :- standing my stance and trying to get her attention, i asked, “so you don’t love me kya?” and she goes like, “oh you want only riddhi to come? fine don’t worry i wont come… i’ll send only here ok? (pleasantly)”… by this time i gave up LOL!

spoke to dad. he was telling me about their move back to kalina. honestly, i was a bit hesistant and i asked him nochalantly, “why?”. i knew the reply that was to proceed… “son, ur granparents are old… and in india this is the way it works… i want to be with them… plus, as your grandpa is mostly active, your granny is usually alone at home and so is mum when we are at khar… now they both get to be together”

i wanted to talk like a grown man. i wanted to relate and explain to my dad that after this long distance things just simply cannot be the same… but then i thought to myself… whats greater? the right for the pain of being flexible all over again, or simply the feeling of being at home? i didn’t say anything. i knew what he felt… how he felt… because if i were in his place, i’d do exactly the same!

hats off to you dad… you are, and have always been my idol!

all this talk and feelings leave me with this succint desire to be back at home :-(

aaaah!

i reckon the best medicine in life is music… the music you associated the best days of your lives with. an overdose of it can just simply shuttle you back, as if you’re travelling through a time portal.

i’m glad it’s working as a charm for me right now! god knows i need it :-)

i’ve been reading a little about voip (voice over ip) today. have been stuck on skype with regards to pc2pc calling, which got me thinking further…

i’m sure this has been developed commercially, but i’ve been wondering what would it take to simply get a phone server/gateway setup on someone’s pc in bombay. the idea is, i can use a pc2pc client to call his/her computer in bombay, which inturns routes the call to the phone and dials out to a local number i specify… and i end up speaking anyone else on a normal phone, with just a local call charge on my friend… hmmmmm…

i didn’t goto work today… just had to take a day off… was so displaced the whole day. just relaxed, played halo (again!) on the xbox, installed redhat linux and then formatted the drive again :- as i couldn’t find support for my netgear usb modem… yeah i “can” connect using the ethernet card, but i use that to connect to the xbox as i used xbmp… so, no!

oh and if anyone here is thinking what to gift me, ever (you don’t need an occaision for a gift do you?), have a look at my amazon wishlist :-)

i’m getting a subtle headache now, guess i need to make myself some good cuppa coffee and read.

sagar asked me to read this a few days ago… “who moved my cheese“, so thats what i’m reading since the past 2 days… i usually read in the trains on the way way back from work… but since we’ve moved offices from north sydney to the city, i never get to sit on the train on my way home and i hate standing and reading :-

me off to read. g’night!

day before i was playing with photoshop, and got caught up in the middle of figuring out how to derive line-art from real-life photographs.

after zillion variations, i came up with this

looks nice to me :-)

phew! yesterday and today have probably been the most stressful days i’ve seen since a long time (@work).

at work today, we had a very big seminar/luncheon for clients to release our new disaster recovery, high availability offering, along with ibm… myself and kayte we at work until 11pm last night so basically i worked at a stretch for 17.5 hours, which included only about 1/2 hour for lunch where i had just a sandwich :-

anyways all our efforts paid up today at the seminar and it was a successful event :-)

on a lighter side, ritesh( ) is having a string of bad days going on… firstly the webhost i suggested to him didn’t really live up to his expectations. secondly, a few days ago i had snail-mailed him a dvd with heaps of appz which included lindows, the os he’s been anxiously awaiting to install… well, all the files on the dvd work, except the lindows iso :- so now i’m sending another cd tomorrow again to him. hope that works!!! chill monty bhaiya, life hai, jee lo jee lo :-)

d been downloading “wishmaster 4 - the prophecy fulfilled” since the last 2 days, seems like it’s finally done :-) so tonight i’ll fall asleep watching this :-)

it’s weird, lately i can’t seem to get any sleep unless i don’t put some flick on the tv and then i tend to fall asleep midway… i mean, i used to be a person who couldn’t sleep even if a candle was burning in the room… and now i need this excessive emmision of light from the tube and the sound to humm me to my dream land!

ungh… i’m tired, i’m exhausted… i want to sleep…. but i wanna see the movie too… and oh yeah… i’m hungry too :-(

so cereal it is for dinner :-)

good night world

i wonder what people mean when they talk about “the dark side” of human presence… time eloquently translates into a journey which is so subtle that you cannot escape it! before you know it, you’ve already turned into a warewolf… and even better… you don’t depend on the moonlight anymore.

keep searching, in vain. but search what? the answer? well don’t you already know that? but then you want a reason… a justification as to why whatever!

wonder if you can snap back out of it… i’ve tried in vain! infinite times and even more…

a rutt! a drag! an insane mindless, lethargic journey, leading to a unforseen destination, where you shake hands and comply with deciet… with the end!

it’s about 1.50 pm… just woke up, had a couple of beers last night with sagar, ‘t was a long night. i’m feeling bad for ritesh ( ), as i suggested him mesopia and he hasn’t yet got any response from their customer service regarding his “welcome email” to set up his hosting account :(

ually is what i call “a whining day”. i tend not to go out or do anything on a sunday as the next day is work and after noon on sundays, the only thing on running on my head is, ‘aahhh another week… get up early, come back late’.

don’t get me wrong here though, i love my job. i think it’s tradition… have been doing this since forever so i think a pattern’s been developed here hehe.

i think i need another cup of coffee, this one’s gotten cold. i need to backup my system, can you believe it… a 250 gig harddrive and i hardly have a about 8-9 gig free!!! well, it’s so convenient to have everything on your harddrive at your beck-n-call. now i gotta back stuff up on dvds, and god thats irritating to look for. there’s this really small, excellent media cataloging tool called cathy (search for cathy in the page). you can use it to index files stored on removable media (CD-ROMs, LS120, Iomega Zip and Jaz disks, or even diskettes), hard disks or net drives, and create searchable catalogs that can be used without having access to original media.

so basically now i’ve gotta keep that updated :-

need coffee!!!